The Thing that held me by the garment

This frail, delicate but magnificent dress of mine had been the best of many dresses. I received it a few years ago from the King. He had a note attached to the dress, reserved for the best of occasions.  As suggested, I  resolved never to wear it to any ordinary occasion and reserved it for this just one occasion.

Here, I was dressed in my regalia, standing in the stead of what could be called “splendor”. The doors  opened before me and I saw subjects standing in honor to welcome me into the presence of the King. They were so many including children and women. 

I took a step towards the door. And then...

I fell flat on my face.

I looked back and I saw this thing that held me by the garment.

“The life of every man is a diary in which he means to write one story, and writes another; and his humblest hour is when he compares the volume as it is with what he vowed to make it”... James Matthew Barrie

Can you connect with any discouraging moment in recent times? If you can’t, I can. Year after year, purring scholarship sites have become a great hobby. I remember my regular routine. After noting deadlines, I spend countless hours, even spreading into months, preparing applications. But one after the other, all I did get in recent years for each of them was a countless “we are sorry, you were not successful this time, reapply” note. This was a horrible phase of life. I've gone through similar things with job applications, business proposals and many other great ambition.   

We all go through down-turning times, so edgy, dark and limiting. To show love to someone and get nothing in return. To show kindness and be brutally rewarded. To turn in applications and receive bundles of disappointing replies, that’s if you ever get a response. It makes you want to quit, throw in the towel and scream, ‘Now What!’ How about doing everything right and still be perceived wrong? How do you cut off failure, a friend, you hate so badly? No short cuts! We all go through disappointing times. 

But the thing is, when you are held by the garment by discouragement, you have two options really. 1. To turn to see discouragement and blame everything that caused you to fall flat on your face. 2. To turn to see perseverance and see an opportunity to rise again. You should realize a fact about failing people. They are not people who failed. They are people who get stuck failing. Although, not actually defeated, they quit. They are people who stopped seeing light in the tunnel and give up reasons to hope.

'1 Samuel 30': David  was held by the same. He had zealously gone to conquer, but to return home to realize that his entire household had been taken captive. His city was burned with fire. It’s like having dreams shattered at the peak of the mountain, hopes dashed at the nearest breakthrough. To you, it could be disappointing news from an intending marriage partner. To another, it could be meeting failure at the peak of a career. To some, it could be a marriage at the verge of break up, after so many years of perseverance and pain. To others, it could be loosing a loved at a point unexpected. For sure, discouragement comes to us in diverse ways. It is not solved by ignoring or becoming fixed to them either.

David and his people cried until strength parted with them. Tears seem no more. More importantly. David saw the anguish of his subject and saw anger first hand as they spoke about stoning him. How bad can this get? But David did a few things right:

1.        He encouraged himself in the Lord. When discouragement hit you hard in the face. Find just that last strength to hope in God.

2.        He turned to God. When strength fails, where else do you turn? Do you turn into your problems for solace. You need to turn only to a source of encouragement. People would suggest, see a therapist, talk to a friend, see your banker, talk to your parent, find a community group to volunteer. Na!  If no one fits the shoes. God does.

3.        He asked the right question. The first few things we are inclined to do in the face of discouragement is to turn into negative confessions. “Things are not working out” “It’s just hard for me nowadays” “The recession is hitting me hard”. Quit self-negative talk. Stop listening to yourself, talk the right thing to yourself.

4.        He had the right attitude and expectation. The problem was not the men who want to stone David  It was not the heat of the moment. It was seeing them as the problem. I remember my usual phrase, “Today shall pass”. This too shall pass. It’s just part of the trouble of the day, but another day will break out on the morrow.

5.        He surrounded himself with the right people, about four hundred men, who were not cumbered by loads of disappointment. Study successful people, not success stories only.

6.        He did good to those who did him wrong. We get clouded in anger when we are discouraged that we miss the very opportunity of life. We often hear, "I cannot let any man break my heart again." "All men are the same". What if closing your eyes to good meant failing for life?

The next time you get held by the garment, remember to take the right decisions and you will better for it on the long run. It’s called the game of persistence against discouragement.